I’m glad I checked out Write Alm’s prompt for today – it is appropriate that the prompt is prayer because my mind has been filled with prayerful thoughts today.Why today more than other days? Because my disabled son is moving out – has finally – moved out of our house.
Corbin will be 26 in August, he has spina bifida, uses a manual wheelchair, has had both legs amputated, has occasional bowel issues and is – well – typical of a lot of young men – not very attentive to household cleanliness. So I have a lot to pray about in this venture of moving out on his own.
I am grateful he is living with other people including one good friend. I am grateful the house has a large living room and kitchen as a wheelchair takes up a lot of space. I am grateful his landlord is making a few accommodations to help with his mobility in and out of his room. I am grateful the house is on the bus line. I am grateful his good friend knows how to cook and both of them plan on combining their EBT cards to shop for food. I am grateful he has a good friend near us and will continue to stop by when he is visiting. I am grateful his housemates are divvying up some of the chores in a way that supports Corbin doing the things he can do like dishes and helping him in things he can’t do like vacuuming.
But I’ve also got my list of worries. Will he remember his hands are filthy from his wheelchair and wash before he touches doors, walls, railings, anything in the refrigerator? Will he have help when his bowels fail him as they do on occasion especially when he’s had a beer or two or three? Will he clean up after his beard trimmings more efficiently than he did in our house? Will he remember not to ball up wet clothing and towels and let them sit in a laundry basket too long? Will he keep at least one month’s rent in his savings account – or better yet – 2 months rent? Will he remember not to tuck his phone under his wheelchair seat when he goes out with friends? (His phone is his life and he can’t afford to lose or break another one.)
And then, of course, I have the regular old mother-concerns…..He needs to finish school. He needs a new wheelchair. He needs to exercise just enough to keep him happy but not stress his neck and back too much. He needs a job or consistent volunteer work to get him out of himself.
So I pray for him and I pray for me. May he feel and be successful in this transition and others to come. May I stop worrying about whether he “can” do this and just celebrate that he “is.”